I'm baaaaack

I apologize for the gap in posts, but hopefully I can make up for it.

I was a middle school teacher before retirement. One day I had students at the board working problems. One of the young ladies was an exceptional student who happened to be a blond. For some reason I told her that she was using a piece of left handed chalk. Without turning around or saying anything she put the chalk in the tray, picked up another piece of chalk, and continued with her problem.
David Gurley

At Math time, I told the kids that we were going to talk about Even and Odd. One boy yelled out- "I know that story. It's in the Bible! " After I quit laughing, I said- "I think you mean Adam and Eve. "
Chris Minch ~ Stuart, FL

Many years ago when I was a teen, I was assisting the Sunday school teacher in class. One Sunday, as we approached the Lenten season , the teacher asked the group of 1st graders if any one of them knew what Lent was. One of the little girls holding her hand high and proud stated that she knew what Lent was. The little girl explained that "Lent" was the little things that her mom picked off the clothes when they came out of the dryer.
Maine

I was a teacher in a tutoring center and at the end of every session, we would ask the students quiz questions for extra tokens. I asked, "What are the three primary colors?". One of my students said, " I know- black, white, and Mexican!!" I laughed so hard, I gave him 2 tokens.
Chrystal Hunt, North Port, FL

One teacher I had for Biology had a special way to remember Kingdom Phylum Class Order Family Genus Species. Her way we found out was King Phillip Came Over For Really Great Spaghetti. But, she was a bit flustered that day and instead of saying King Phillip Came Over For Really Great Spaghetti, she said King Phillip Came Over For Really Great Sex.
Claire A. ~ CA

A kindergarten student at my school was sent to the office for saying a rather naughty word in the cafeteria. I talked to him about using other words to say when he was angry. We practiced "shucks", "darn", "rats", etc. I told him my favorite word was "dag nab it!". He said he liked that one, we high-fived each other and I went off feeling like I helped him. I later walked back in the office to find him still sitting there. He jumped off his stool, ran up to me and yelled "DAMN RABBITS!!" while grinning ear to ear!
Mary Slavin ~ Stuart, FL

And one final for the pregnant ladies...
I teach preschool, 2 year olds. When I was Pregnant with my 3rd child, I saw no reason to tell my class because they were so young. As the year was coming to an end, I grew quite large. One of my little darlings came up to me and said," Miss Ilene, your belly is getting very fat!" I asked this little boy if he'd like to know why, and he said yes. I told him I had a baby in my tummy. He walked away, saying nothing. The next day, this happy, never cry child pitched a fit when his mother tried to leave. She pulled him aside and they talked for a few minutes, and the little boy calmed down, and the mom was grinning from ear to ear. I asked what happened and she said, "Adam thought you might eat him, you've already eaten a baby."
I.Kendig ~ GA

Thanks to www.yesiteach.org